Friday, 19 July 2013

The ten commandments

If you are a parent to one or twenty children, you will know no matter how much preparation you put in to anything or how well you think you know your child they will always amaze you with always being one step ahead of you.  I have put together a list of my favourite life lessons my children have taught me over the past five years......
1. If you have something rattling in your games console it is probably a camera memory card.....or two and they wont come out again !
2. You can't wash mini cheddars
3. Your favourite/most expensive mascara will never recover after your daughter or son has got hold of it
4. However good your speed tidy up before visitors arrive was, your child will locate the most inappropriate object they can find to show your guests
5.  When speaking to someone you really don't know your newborn will suddenly gain fantastic coordination grab your top and bra and expose your breast to them!
6. Baby ballet is totally the place to stand still in the middle of the room making poo noises while filling your nappy
7. Children will always mispronounce, drop letters from or use their own interpretation of words when out in public, my current favourites are clock,  and catch it
8. No matter how many times you asked your son if they need the toilet before you leave home they will always need to go when you are nowhere near one resulting in a fun 100 metre dash
9. If your child hands you a snail shell with no occupant think the worse :p
10. Never underestimate your childs ability to point out your embarrassment,  a sudden gust of wind resulting in everyone in close proximity knowing what colour knickers you are wearing is a great story to recount to anyone they meet.....
No matter what they do and how much they make us blush, we are very lucky to be a witness to their little journey into life and we will all be there waving those ah bless photos around when they grow up
Emma x